Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Just go with the flow....

I sometimes get in a hurry and and get frustrated when I feel like nothing is happening fast enough for me...I'm impatient. I expect change to occur right away. Then I realize that life doesn't work that way. I get tired. I'm overwhelmed with life. But recently I have been reminded that even the wings of a butterfly can cause change. Change can occur gradually, slowly, very very slowly...but it is still progress. And we are only human: how can we be aware of all of this change at once? Impossible! Being mindful that the need to control our surroundings can be a powerful force that's pushing others away when you need them most. For me, a gentle reminder by a close friend can bring about an awareness of the problem for me, which may help to bring about a sense of clarity. Taking a deep breath and starting over can also sometimes propel me forward when all I want to do is throw myself in the floor, kicking and screaming because life isn't fair. Maybe the key to being content with slow, gradual change can be found in the knowledge that even small changes and slow growth equals a net change. If you have a dream, prioritize what it is that you need to do in order to start the ball rolling. Don't forget that we were put in earth to be in relationship with other humans: no man (or woman) can do this life thing alone. ALONE... That's a quiet road, indeed, don't venture down the path with the idea that you need no one and so you won't accept any assistance from anyone else. Trust me, others need you just as much as you need them. There is no such thing as freedom in solitude. Not forever, anyway. We all just need to define healthy boundaries and remember to take time every now and then to carve out some space in which to comfort and pamper our own souls, in whatever way we find is most calming and soothing. 
So...what are you waiting for? Put on your grown-up pants and get out there and LIVE. Remember that even small changes are happening all around you, whether or not you see the effects. Relax and stop expecting everything NOW. It's going to be ok, just slow down and be good to yourself. what are you waiting for?

Monday, August 11, 2014

A heart for service

Recently it has been put heavily my heart that I am to feed and clothe people. As in a life mission. Please pray that my thoughts remain focused and my endeavors true. I was never meant to be draped in diamonds and covered in gold, and I am grateful that I have a heart for service. But my mind tends to wander and then get overwhelmed when I get philanthropic: I get excited about changing the world and I have trouble remembering that I need to take one day at a time, and take care of myself before I reach out to uplift others. It takes me longer to accept what everyone else around me knows as fact because I am stubborn. I am also a loyal and faithful friend. If I walk away from someone or something, it isn't for my lack of trying. Many times throughout my life, I have made myself physically ill with worry that I have either done too much or not enough. I have a great capacity for care and concern, and because of that, I tend to be very intense. For this, I am grateful, because though it can be lonely at times, I tend to scare people off who aren't up for the challenge of authenticity off, and I guess in the scheme of things, it helps to narrow down my circle of real friends. So today, I am putting it into the universe that I believe....no, I KNOW: that I am enough, I have worth, and I have purpose. Through God, all things are possible.